As we are going through the motions of another garage move, I do like to de-clutter and watch things getting binned, as there is a certain satisfaction to filling skips up with the non-moving items. The only problem with this is we generally get asked for those very same parts about three weeks after I skipped them even though they have sat on the shelf for the last four years without any interest or enquires!! True story.
Anyway, as we are moving again, it gives you time to take stock of things that will come with you and the things that won’t. I have bought some truly great workshop tools throughout the years which have made the job easier & safer and have saved me loads of man hours on various jobs. The times over my lifetime when I didn’t have the right tool for the job and I have tried to make do or driven around the world to borrow the tool with promises of getting it back to the owner within three milliseconds of completing the job must run into the hundreds…..well about eight times to be truthful but that isn’t the point. It is eight times too many.
So anyway, this leads me on to my worst garage buys. Maybe not worst but not actually needed or used in the end is probably more correct. I bought a pallet banding machine to save time and effort to securing items on pallets but it was so fiddly that it lasted just one pallet job, so we put it away into a corner of the workshop to just gather dust where it still sits to this day. And yes it is going in the skip. The next one I recall was a battery jump starter by an unknown company name, didn’t bother reading the reviews and just went out and bought it. It failed miserably first time on the smallest of engine, so it was returned pronto back to the seller. The next one was an engine stand so that I could work on engines when time allowed it but to be fair, engines don’t last long in the workshop before they are sold so that was a big fat waste of time. Plus, most of the locking pins have been lost/mislaid over time, so now it is as much use as Anne Franks drum kit.
Other things I recall were specialised oil baths/parts cleaners, which when you got a bit giddy and were giving it loads to get some ingrained dirt off parts it looked like the Gulf of Mexico oil spill disaster with more oil on you/the floor than actually in the oil bath. Yes you guessed it…..binned straight away. Now that I think more about it, there has been loads of crap stuff…wheel dollies that didn’t do what they were supposed to do and became all weak and feeble. I really must concentrate on decent tools in the future and not buy tat.
Anyways, must shuffle off now
All the best
PS I have just sorted out WhatsApp on Andys phone and now he calls it WhatsUp??!!! Ffs, will this pain never end…
Well what can I say….moving again!!!! Jeez this is getting painful now…second move in as many years. To be fair, we are struggling with the limited room so it is time to up sticks and move on. We really must make this next move work and be our permanent home, as I don’t think I can do this again as I am beginning to lose the will to live. Anyway, we are well underway with the move, so we best get our skates on as I have a holiday to enjoy coming up the rails quickly. Looking forward to 2 weeks away doing diddly squat apart from eating/drinking. That’s probably a big fat lie….I will be worried sick that the new unit will be burnt down by the time I get back or a plague of locusts will have descended on us in biblical proportions & devoured all the Brembo brake calipers or some other catastrophe!!!! Palpitations now….do I really want a holiday????
We have just suffered a theft of parts at the unit too. Broad daylight, hopped over the fence and robbed some catalytic converters then high tailed it off the industrial estate in their getaway Citreon Piccasso. All caught on CCTV but Police can’t be bothered doing much even though number plate is easily visible…probably not a big enough crime for them to put their doughnuts down for. And as for the ‘security’ guards on site…who needs a password or anything when they just wave you on and wish the tea leaves well in their thieving expedition. Shoulders being shrugged from everybody as it is not their problem. Double thumbs up from me guys, you are all special.
Also in the same week, I received a parking fine too. I couldn’t understand this one as I always pain the £1 charge to park, so you can imagine my horror to getting a fine for £160. I still had my parking receipt so was scratching my head till I realised that I had paid for the next car park along and not the one that I was parked on. Run by the same company, they didn’t want to know about human error or any other nonsense, it was the fine or nothing. That’s me on dry bread and water this week then….
I would also like to welcome my daughter aboard onto the team, joining us as a Director of the company. Looking forward to mithering her for things and being a general pain in the a*se 🙂 I am sure it will be all good honey x
Now onto the phenomenon that is Andy. Whilst picking up our respective meals at the end of the day, he thought it was highly amusing that he had a bastard chicken meal, the school boy humour really tickled him till I pointed out that it was actually a basted chicken meal but that didn’t seem to stop him chuckling that it was a bastard meal and telling complete strangers who were shopping what he had discovered!!! The sad thing was some laughed with him (the 6 fingered on one hand variety) whilst others just looked at him as though he was moonstruck or something….I really do need a holiday I think. Also he thinks it is highly amusing when the van’s reserve light comes on as it makes an audible ‘ping’…he smiles like a Cheshire cat whilst I search for my wallet (again). The joys of picking up all the bills eh?
Anyway till next time, adieu
Just like buses, when one arrives another one is just around the corner. As predicted, virtually everything has flown off the first S2 we only got a couple of weeks ago…engine & gearbox off to Poland, black leather interior off to a good home…in fact not a lot left full stop!! We have just about finished off sweeping up around this carcass when the next S2 has rocked up.
The ‘new’ one has got a good engine & gearbox, so cannot see any reason why these units will hang around too long. The interior is quite nice too, cream leather seats which should sell themselves. Will be listing the sets of Brembo brake calipers we now have in stock off these two vehicles and fingers crossed they will be soon on their merry way.
We have had a good few months this year selling loads of parts off after a pretty quiet start to the year and I would just like to take this opportunity to thank the team for all their hard work and dedication to the effort.
Anyways, I think that is all for the time being. Will keep you posted to anymore exciting developments in the land of the Porsche parts.
All the best
Well look what we have found!! A 3.0 Porsche 944 S2 in good nick…well, the bodywork isn’t fab but the interior is belting. Full black leather seats in great condition with matching black interior in good condition too. Giddy kipper time all round…even comes with a working Porsche tyre compressor.
I suspect that the engine and the interior won’t hang around, they are getting increasingly rare to get in this condition. There is quite a lot of good salvageable parts on this one, so I will keep you posted on the parts as they come off.
Also just managed to pick another 944 S2 up, so will let you know when that one makes an appearance. We seem to be having a run on the older stuff at the moment..at least it keeps Andy out of mischief. You don’t hear a peep out of him when these rock up, I am sure he could dismantle one in his sleep.
Anyways, all the best and will write soon’ish.
Hi to each and everyone of you
Just thought I would have a catch up and keep peeps up to date with goings on at the madhouse. We had a slow start to the year but it has picked up nicely now, so now we are running around like headless chickens trying to keep up….sometimes failing badly but generally all good on the madness scales.
Our bubble wrap, scotch tap, cellotape etc are bought in from the internet in bulk so we always have plenty in to get orders out on time and in a safe manner. But our boxes are the bane of my life at times, we have all manner of sizes and shapes which just take up soooooooo much room…..plus rolls of bubble wrap everywhere just puts a top hat on things!! We get given packing boxes from everywhere and anywhere as we are always in constant need and I never check what is on the external packaging labels. I should do because one time there were hazardous chemical symbols all over the box and the courier had to be persuaded that it wasn’t nuclear waste he would be carrying from Chernobyl but a brake caliper. I was even close to opening the package to convince him!!
Anyway to cut a long story short, this particular day we had boxed different orders up as we always do, booked them for collection etc. I didn’t think anymore about it till a few days later an irate customer contacted me demanding answers. Perplexed I tried to get to the bottom of the matter as I knew the part was a good one. It turned out it was the packaging that was the problem as we had dispatched his order in a ‘Rampant Rabbit’ vibrator box that had been left on his door step by the courier due to nobody being home. He wasn’t best pleased….I mean what would his neighbours think of him/his wife in leafy suburbia Chalfont St Giles? I shudder to think…. shudder probably not the best choice of word there 🙂
Hopefully he understood that it was a genuine mistake and we promised that we would be more careful with our packaging next time….I have a sneaky suspicion that the courier knew all about it all along and left it in plain view for chuckle purposes.
Anyways, will write again soonest.
All the best
Hi to each and everyone of you
Just thought I would share some of the stuff we have had over the years which have made us chuckle. The red 986 Boxster we were dismantling in the photo above had outer over sills fitted, so as we removed them we were met with these words of wisdom. I would like to think of this moment as not only being informative but also showed the ‘naughty’ boys had a sense of humour too. How their sides must have ached with all the belly laughs and guffaws they endured with this little wheeze of ingenuity.
I would also like to take this opportunity to mention Andy’s ability to destroy things which should be bullet proof on paper….but obviously nothing on Earth has been created to my knowledge that can stop the unstoppable force that is Andy. This phenomena first came to my notice early on in his employment with us. The engine hoist which had previously been a stalwart of modern machinery soon began to ‘lose’ locating pins and other key items, which were then mysteriously replaced by all manner of odd tools and screwdrivers to replicate the missing locating pins. I am not sure to this day whether he thought I hadn’t noticed these oddments or he was just using his ‘special’ talent to improvise the vanishing mystery. It seems to be an unspoken rule not to mention these things, so we both skirt around the subject to this very day. I have now grown rather fond of our hedgehog looking engine hoist but not too sure about the health and safety aspect of things. I actually believe it is now Andy proof and should be certified to that effect.
Only this week, I noticed the indestructible dust pan made out of Krupp steel was now in 2 parts lying on the workshop floor. I felt like it was my duty to mention this to him only to be met with some mumbled story of how it had just fallen apart!!! This thing was quite possibly from the pre-Jurassic period and had been forged by molten lava from Middle Earth eons previously, so had stood up to some serious stuff in its long and glorious career but had obviously met its match when Andy appeared on the scene!! It had witnessed the demise of the dinosaurs, countless wars fought in many lands, seismic activity and tsunamis around the world, flower power and the 60’s, The Berlin Wall coming down but had no answer to Andy and his destructive ways. Things will never be quite the same with this ending of an era.
And then there is Andy and his ‘improv’ way of how to remove parts or do a task. Not bothering with a standard by the book methodology or logical way to do things, Andy likes to do it his way….which ultimately means nine times out of ten will always end in disaster. A familiar theme of starting with the very best of intentions generally ends in abject failure and back to the drawing board but on the very rare occasions that he is successful then boy do we all know about it with his constant re-runs of each particular moment during the task that were so blatantly obvious to him (and to no one else) that this ‘mechanicing’ lark is a doddle and is as easy as shelling peas. There is no working with him in these Eureka moments and we have all learned to make ourselves scarce. It gives Andy more time to work on his stories even more and the final embellished stories take on saga like proportions by the next telling of the story. Please Lord, take me now….
Anyways, more stories from the madhouse coming soon
All the best
To say I am a little giddy with this lump is an understatement. It has been a real pleasure working on this monster & we are learning quite a bit on the way too….especially Andy, who can now manage to make a semi decent brew after all these years of trying!! And yes, he can be trying. I am soooo proud of him though, it is like witnessing a toddlers first foot steps. You really do have to cherish these moments as they don’t last long. As long as we avoid getting botulism over the next few weeks then I think we are on the home run and our immune system will cover the rest 🙂 If only he could work the microwave though……it looks like Chernobyl sometimes when he has been heating his pie up!!
Got loads of photos/parts to list from this beast so keep your peepers peeled in the coming days/weeks for some real gems to be had. We shall be populating the website soonest, so happy days on that score. Andy has worked like a little Trojan on this one and I as always have been fantastic too 🙂 Even bought a workshop manual on this one so I could swat up and sound learned on the subject matter. May need a bit more time on that though.
Anyhows, going to sign off for now and get reading
All the best